Why in the hell is LeBron nominated for Time's Person of the Year? Aside from screwing over Cleveland on national television, shouldn't he be disqualified for stealing a tablecloth right off some poor, unsuspecting table and wearing it as a shirt? That being said, the world breathed a sigh of relief -- LeBron's ego-stroking movie has been canceled.
Remember that link I posted a few days ago introducing you to the world of Bacon-Flavored Soda? Well, I have found a review. It sounds just as vile and wrong as I anticipated: "The bacon soda’s smoky and sweet flavor tastes like Jones Soda figured out a way to bottle the things that make babies cry: smoke and candy taken away from babies."
Breaking footbawful news: Donovan McNabb has agreed to a contract extension with the Redskins. A FIVE year, $78 million extension worth up to $88 million with incentives. SNYYYYYYDER!! In case you didn't remember, this is the same 34 year old McNabb who was benched in favor of Rex Grossman recently in a two-minute drill situation. I have no joke that can possibly be funnier than the reality of this situation. Just soak it in for a few minutes.
Worst of the Weekend in Pictures:
Nationally Televised Games:
Grizzlies at Magic, NBA TV, 7pm: Is it possible the Magic will lose three straight home games? If so, will Stan Van Gundy completely lose his voice by the end of the night? That could be entertaining.
All the Other Games:
Timberwolves at Bobcraps, 7pm: Why must the bad teams have to beat up on each other every single night this season? (For our amusement, obviously, but it artifically inflates their records, so it can only be amusing to a point...) The Bobcraps will probably get their first home victory of the season tonight, but honestly, who really cares? Perhaps these two teams should try to recruit this girl to fix their offensive woes:
Hornets at Mavericks, 8:30pm Trevor Ariza opining on his team winning with defense rather than offense: "We know our offense is going to come. We've got players here that can score with the basketball." Well, that's nice. It's awfully hard to score without the basketball, after all.
Nuggets at Suns, 9pm: I betcha the Nuggets sure glad the Suns got their three point barrage game out of their systems before playing them. It'd bring on flashbacks from that hellish Pacers game if they started raining those threes on the Nuggets.
Thunder at Jazz, 9pm: The Jazz are somehow going to find a way to come back from being down by 50 points at halftime before this season is over, mark my words.
Pistons at Warriors, 10:30pm: Well, so much for that hot start by Golden State. The Warriors are falling apart like an ice sculpture in a sauna, and David Lee's infected elbow isn't helping matters.
Nyets at Clippers, 10:30pm: Instead of watching the Clippers be who we thought they were, go watch this clip instead (via Deadspin). Trust me. It will be the greatest thing you do all day. (You know, unless you save a kitten from a tree or something. Then watching this would be the second greatest thing you do all day.) Who cares if it's apparently staged? It's still awesome.
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