Michael Beasley, or Chubby Checker?Suggested reading: here is a nice summary of why Andrea Bargnani hurts the Craptors.
Worst of the Night in Pictures:
If the Lakers need someone to shoot Kareem's sky hook in the playoffs, they can always turn to this dancer
Nationally Televised Games:
Bucks at Heat, ESPN, 8pm: Dwyane Wade might miss this crucial game for Miami's hopes of holding home-court advantage for the first two rounds of the playoffs. Ohhhh noooooo! Good thing they could play 5-on-4 like a hockey powerplay and the Bucks still couldn't score.
Lakers at Warriors, ESPN, 10:30pm: Thanks to the reference to Manos in the WOTN post, I will now hear Torgo's Theme in my head whenever I see Mamba dribbling.
All The Other Games:
Knicks at 76ers, 7pm: This game has essentially zero effect on seeding for the postseason. Yet the Knicks are calling this "a big game" because they want some momentum heading into the playoffs. This really is happening. You aren't dreaming.
Cadavers at Craptors, 7pm: Craptors beat writer Holly MacKenzie sarcastically referred to this as a "barnburner" on Twitter this morning. I actually think that's a pretty appropriate name. If these two teams were playing in a barn, you'd want to burn it.
Magic at Bobcraps, 7pm: Here's a quote straight from the Stats LLC game preview: "The Bobcats are coming off back-to-back losses to two of the worst teams in the East and have dropped three straight overall." It can't be said any more on-the-nose than that right there.
Nyets at Pistons, 7:30pm: Deron Williams' wrist continues to be an issue. He might even miss the final five games of the season. So, I guess it's time for Jersey fans to watch the Devils go on their annual postseason run, right? Oh, wait...
Rockets at Hornets, 8pm: I don't get it. The Rockets just refuse to die! When did the zombie apocalypse hit Texas?
Suns at Timberwolves, 8pm: Ugh, this game depresses me. I'm just gonna go watch highlights from the Par 3 contest at The Masters. That's a good way to prepare myself for the Suns' postseason plans.
Clippers at Thunder, 8pm: Scott Brooks, confusing quote machine: "Almost is not good until you get it." But isn't it no longer considered "almost" when you do get it?
Nuggets at Mavericks, 8:30pm: Serious question for Nuggets fans: they've been on a hell of a run since the Carmelo trade, but are the injuries for Afflalo, Birdman, and Mozgov worrying?
Kings at Spurs, 8:30pm: The Kings have long been eliminated from playoff contention, but now they are "playing hard and together as a team," according to coach Paul Westphal. So why the hell didn't they start doing this back in December or January when it would have been useful??