Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Bawful After Dark: Last night of the regular season

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Golden State is just full of morale

Have you ever wondered what Stan Van Gundy would look like without a mustache? Or with mutton chops? Here's your opportunity: The Interactive Stan Van Gundy Makeover. (Thanks Basketbawful reader Big Aaron)

Seriously, that link is a must-click. Go check it out. It's bound to be more fun than 99% of tonight's games.

In news that should be shocking to absolutely nobody that reads this blog, Isaiah Rider is a damn trainwreck and has been arrested again. For some reason, he thought it would be a good idea to kidnap his one-month-old son Isaiah Rider IV. For those keeping score at home, this is the fourth time this month that Rider has been in trouble with the law. I would detail his other run-ins with Johnny Law, but I don't feel like wearing out my keyboard.

Also, some tidbits from this story:
1) The Lakers are so bored that DJ Mbenga convinced Ron Artest he wasn't crazy enough and needed to dye his hair blond.
2) Lamar Odom wants to grow a playoff beard and also dye it blond.
3) Phil Jackson is already working the refs and trying to play mind games with Kevin Durant.

Worst of the Night in Pictures:
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Apparently Mbenga decided Artest wasn't crazy enough. Never thought I'd type those words...


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Alright, that's it. I'm going shopping for a bright purple suit.


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With all that's going on with the Bulls and VDN right now, do I really need to caption this?


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Aren't you glad Nellie's going to be back next year?

Nationally Televised Games:
Grizzlies at Thunder: We have eleven games starting tonight at 8pm. And this is the one ESPN is airing? Could be worse, I suppose. At least it isn't a Pacers-Bullets game or something.

Suns at Jazz: So what's been the secret to the Suns' success this year? Take a look:


All The Other Games:
Crabs at Hawks: The Hawks know the Crabs won't give a crap about this game and LeBron will be resting again. Maybe the Hawks will repay the favor by showing some southern hospitality and take the Crabs to this place. Now that's my kind of restaurant.

Spurs at Mavericks: Ooh, a potential first round preview game. If the Mavs win, the Spurs will be dropped to the #7 seed.

Hornets at Rockets: The last time the Rockets played, we got to see a classic revenge game from Kevin Martin. In this game, however, we have absolutely nothing to look forward to.

Bucks at Celtics: The last game between these teams was intense like a playoff game. And it's possible that these teams will face each other in the first round if the Heat lose tonight to help the Bucks get the #5 seed...

Nyets at Heat: ...Yeah. So much for that #5 seed, Milwaukee. Have fun playing the Hawks in the first round!

Pistons at Timberwolves: Ugh.

76ers at Magic: A victory here and the Magic will lock up home court advantage if they have an NBA Finals rematch against the Lakers. Nice to know at least one team has some reason to show up for this game.

Pacers at Bullets: Oh, damn it all. What a horrible game. (For perspective, I believe it won't even be televised!) On behalf of another Washington team:

Bricks at Craptors: The Craptors can still get into the postseason with a win here and a Bulls loss tonight. Bosh is out, and Weems is a game-time decision. However, their opponent is STILL the Bricks, so hold your heads up guys! There's still a chance you'll get to lose another four games in a row before you get to call it a season.

Bulls at Bobcats: Well, the Bobcats may have nothing to play for, but coach Larry Brown isn't going to give the Bulls a free pass: "It will be a meaningful game for Chicago, so we're going to have to go out and try to win. It wouldn't be right just to go out and play." I have to admit, I kind of respect that.

Lakers at Clippers: Well, if there's ever been a chance for the Clippers to build some momentum, this has to be it. Then again, considering the Clippers and they are who we thought they were, they'll probably go and do something Clippery and lose this game by 30 points or something.

Warriors at Frail Blazers: If you're trying to lock up the #6 seed, the Warriors HAS to be on your short list of desired opponents, right?

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